I’m trying to figure out why I shouldn’t go meet this guy at the beach. I’m afraid to leave the house but you know sometimes thats just embarrassing to try to explain to people. I’m afraid I’ll have a panic attack – what else is new? He seems to want to see me and I’d like to see him seeing as we have been talking every night for months now. He seems like a good guy. What’s the problem?
I couldn’t find a problem logical enough for me to stay home. I honestly felt compelled to go, like if I’d miss something if I didn’t.
I don’t remember much of my drive there, its a blur of nerves, heat, sun, and finding my way by memory. I do remember I arrived at our designated meeting spot before he did. This allowed me lots of extra time to be nervous and get even more sweaty then I already was.
He arrived just a few minutes after me. He pulled up and parked beside me. We both drive red cars. Interesting. I looked over to wave like the goofball that I am and time stopped for a second in my head. Even though now he was a little older and looked a little different with a full beard and beautiful LONG blonde hair, it was him. He looked like a rockstar with his classic aviators on. He smiled, my heart skipped a beat. “DON’T DO ANYTHING STUPID” I say to myself, I beg my brain not to go all panic on me and ruin what could be a glorious day.
As we gathered our beach things I chattered about who knows what trying to seem calm, cool, and collected. I noticed he noticed my awesomeness- thank you Venus.com “Marilyn enhancer” bikini top. I tried not to be super self conscience about my newly short hair- it seemed like a good idea a week ago but now that I’m seeing his golden locks I’m jealous and desire to match.
We walked and talked and slugged our stuff down to the beach. I love the beach, I do. I used to go as a kid all the time. I forgot about the beach over the years. I honestly had not been back since the summer we met. It felt good to be by the water, on the sand. It was a good day to go to the beach. There wasn’t a ton of people yet there were enough around to make people watching interesting. I forgot my SPF 50 but I managed to have a bottle of SPF 8 tanning lotion… Needless to say we BURNED. We were out there for hours just lying on the sand talking. The time flew by, not once did I feel the need to leave, not once did I feel panicked or puke-y nor did I even think about it. I could feel my skin burning but I didn’t want to leave. There was something about him. Something I could not let go, I wanted it, whatever it was.
Eventually due to our burning skin and probable dehydration we had to end our beach day. He helped me put my stuff in my car and gave me a sweaty hug before I got in, HEART SKIPS BEAT. He promises to text me later and even though I tell myself not to get to hung up on something I don’t know is anything I’m elated. He got in his car and waited for me to start my car and get going before he did. He followed me to the first stop sign where I went left and he went straight.
I do remember driving home from the beach. I felt different then the girl who drove to the beach. felt lucky in a way, lucky that I made the unusual decision to leave the house. I didn’t know what would happen. I didn’t know if he was into me, my awesomeness in my bikini top or what he was even looking for. I didn’t know if he would text me later like he said or if I would even see him again. But something, something just felt right. For a worrier I was oddly not worried about this. I was curious as to where it would go. Somehow I felt like I had met my match. I just had the best day with Mr. Beautiful, THE BEST DAY in a sea of sad days. He was different.
Ever since that day last June we have been INSEPARABLE. He did indeed text me later and we continue to text, talk, and see each other everyday. He is different and he makes me see things differently. He is beautiful inside and out and he makes me feel beautiful inside and out. He never judges me and he isn’t bothered AT ALL by my panic situation. We are on the same page of the same chapter of the same book and it is amazing. I never thought I could have this. I have what I’ve always wanted and it blows my mind.
He waited years for me and I hope to spend years making it up to him. Had I not been on that beach on that day all those years ago we may have never met. Had I not gone against my own personal rules and given him my info we may have never kept in touch. Had he not been persistent we may have never met again at the beach. Life really does work in mysterious ways and love is real.